Thursday, February 5, 2009

Today... Solipsism Returns!

Happy birthday to me
Happy birthday to me
I'm finally fifty
maybe it's about time I grew up.

Synaptic Retreat

He thinks I love him. He thinks so.
He says it, says it all the time.
Says it enough for one two three, a whole heaping of cozy
So it must be true, right?
While I, I say nothing
Lips move, brush ear, neck, flesh, but no sound escapes
Waves his hand, magic spell, as if that makes it so
I, scornful, want to rip that smile right off but when my nails touch...
finally say, if wishes were horses, beggars would ride.
Shakes his head, smiles so soft it's a caress, replies,
flesh tells me all I need to know. Horde your words. It's fine.
I cannot hold him tight enough.

Memory and Politics: Sept 11th Revisited

Memory is short, too short.
You wanted this.
You really wanted it, begged for it
Blessed god that we were doing this, taking this stance.

We're going to bomb those fuckers right off the face of the earth.

Well, we got it.
Look around.
Look real good.

Happy now?

Yeah. I thought so.

Pond Scum Redux

"I'd love to see you again. I miss you so."
Trying so hard to seduce the girl inside that wants to believe
Oh! She wants to believe!
It's her. She's special. Different. Her.
She knows the truth. She's just another port.
Easier to cultivate the weed and call it a flower
than to actually tend a garden.

Cold Snap-Revised

Sprawled in my bed, face down. If you were here
if you were
I'd be warm, too warm.
Strip off clothes, blankets, skin, strip them off, throw them off. Pull me close.
If you were here
There is a pile of pillows in your spot. I huddle with them
‘Are you warm now? Are you warm enough? Come closer,' your leg thrown over me.
Touching you on the computer screen, pixel DNA, not you, just bits and bytes and smoke and mirrors
smell of lonely makes my nose frown, bite not-your-ear, just polyester fiberfill
hands grasp the mattress. They hold empty.
The world sees empty, but me?
‘Come closer. Sleep. It'll wait til morning. It'll keep. Let me.'
Tighter, pull me tighter, don't want morning to come.
I can touch you. I can.